Sweet Baby- Ted Hawkins

http://new.music.yahoo.com/ted-hawkins/tracks/sweet-baby--2005525
I am so glad you're mine

I don't know if anyone else does this but sometimes when I hear a song I think "this is a song I would want someone, fill in the blank...  (Son, sister, boyfriend) to put on a mix for me".  In this case, it is the song I would want my Superman to put on a mix tape to me. The words or feelings of the song seem to be exactly, well mostly what I hope that person would say to me.  This is one of those songs.

Sweet Baby,
 I consider this my song, not our song, but mine.  But I am ahead of myself.  Me and my Superman have both recently discovered Ted Hawkins.  We were hanging out at his house late one Saturday, the house stereo tuned to Bluesville.  Cocktails, not our first or last for the night, were cold in our hands.  Maybe it was a little-dancing-going-on-in-the-kitchen, kind of Saturday night. We heard our first Ted Hawkins tune and have been listening to him since...
No one can love you the way I do...
Under other circumstances that line would be so cliche' and not the one I want to hear.  I wouldn't be letting this song tell my story.  But, my Supe is Superman for a reason, HELL for a lot of reasons.  That is why this song tells my story, his story, his story with me. Well, actually maybe my view of him in my story. But back to the line...NO one can love me the way he does.  He makes it so easy for me to love myself.  Sometimes I look at him and I see this beauty in his face.  It is like the beauty of his smile is a reflection of what he sees in me. I get all wrapped up in that look.  That look that so clearly says, I am enough. Maybe I am even reaching being more than just enough....
And I can prove it cause I am gonna stay here alone with you
I can't really adequately explain my present without touching on my past.  I spent 3 decades with cheater.  The lies fuck up your soul.  Not just the lies they tell you, but more so the lies you tell yourself to keep standing there. Somewhere on that craizy (yeah I know it is spelled wrong.  I add the i  for an emphasis.  It places a little insanity in the middle of crazy)  but, in that craizy mess of days, I lost all trust, even in myself.  I was never enough.  I KNOW I wasn't enough for HIM. By the last decade of my marriage, I knew that no matter what he did, even if he changed, I would never believe it was for real.  He could never prove it to me.  The damage was done; I thought for always.  It was a given that I never really expected to trust anyone.  But along came Superman.  He would walk me over the minefields of healing, slowly and with encouragement. He has stayed...and he is alright with it being ONLY ME.  Yes, Supe proved to me the one thing I needed to know, that I am enough for him to stay here, ALONE, needing no others but me.
So I can kiss you,
In our story this is a question. Yes, he can kiss me.  That was how it started...I looked at him and said would you like to kiss me.  Well a kiss is never just a kiss. : )  I think I told him that too!
I Can't resist you, Again, such a cliche', yet not.  He can't resist me... not like some big fairy tale in the sky.  He can't resist me because we have agreed to write our own story.  We date (years, not months), we are committed but we maintain our separate lives.  He can't resist me because I am the only woman I know who can care and nurture him and yet see him maybe twice a week, never talk on the phone, and be glad to go home when I am ready to run my own world. Really we have a sweet deal.  Who can resist that LOL. I've lost my head over you, did you mean it when you told me you love me so
This go round, we are older.  We aren't looking for a repeat of the kind of commitments we needed in our youth. Our hearts aren't what is really on the table here.  This time we, or at least me...I lost my head not my heart.  I play my heart a little closer to the chest these days. I have told him I love him...not the "I love you"declaration floating out there.  But I tell him I love him ...so,  as in, I love you so because you are kind.  I love you so because I you like me. Some times I worry he won't understand, this isn't about holding back, but not cluttering the landscape with ties that bind.  I am past being "bound". He doesn't judge me because I don't have the "I love yous" of my early years.
Do you like it? You better believe I'm gonna let you know
Yes, I like it.  I like it cuz you do let me know.  You have said I am your addendum and that is perfect to me. You let me know at every turn that you are real in word and deed.
Now don't you dig me, tell me one more time
Yes, I DIG you, hell I like you!  Dig is old school.  We are old school.  We are New, Old school.
Ain't you glad you're mine?
Simply...YES
Does it feel good when I hold you in my loving Arms?
Yes it does.  Those arms are lovingly kind.  Love does not hurt, is what I know in his arms.  Being in his arms is safe.
Why do you tremble  when I am giving up all my charms...
I tremble because he gives all his charms to me, just me, only me!
Come and hold me darling, You're my desire
You ask me to hold you, I like not having to do the asking. In an unwritten dance, I hold you.  I hold your feet to the fire and remind you that you are among the living.  He in returns desires me. He wants me. Me, Just me!
Girl you set my soul on fire
That I know...wink wink, giggle giggle.  Who said this whole thing has to be about a lesson, or righting wrongs.  I know I got fire....it is MY superpower.
Did you see me dancing close to that beautiful girl? RU jealous, Betcha you're the maddest girl in the world.
If you were anyone else, I think I would be mad.  MAD that you were chatting with a friend at work.  MAD you talk about some one too much.  MAD that I have to look for hints in every exchange with you that you're about to pull the rug out from under my feet. MAD...MAD even when there is nothing to be MAD about.  Living with a cheater makes you like that. It starts our with you're getting MAD and ends up with you being MAD, Craizy MAD
Don't you worry darling, I would do nothing at all, that would cause your tear drops to fall
I know that...GOD I know that.  He has proved it over and over.  He has proven it with who he is.  He proved it long after the need to prove it had passed  This is life with a Superman.  He doesn't make you cry...and Cry and CRY
I am so glad you're mine.
And this line is the icing to my cake.... he is GLAD I am his. And that is why this is the song I would want him to put on my mix tape.  It is what I hear him say without words. On a mix tape it would tell me he wanted to know I heard what he was saying.  It is all the things he has said...in word and deed.  This is my song.  This is what I hear him sing to me in the everyday give and take of our lives....I am so glad!  I am so glad he is mine.  I am so glad,he is glad, he's mine.